The Five-Minute Father

Andriel showed me his new Pokemon drawing. I was looking at my phone.

“Dad, look!”

“Mm-hmm, that’s great, bud.”

I hadn’t even looked.

He knew. Kids always know.

The Pattern

I’m physically present but mentally elsewhere. Work problems. Upcoming deadlines. That bug I can’t figure out.

My kids get my body. My attention is somewhere else.

New rule: When my kids talk to me, phone goes down. Computer stays closed. I look at them.

Fully present for five minutes beats half-present for an hour.

Presence is a practice. It doesn’t happen automatically. You have to choose it.

Kids know the difference. Between being there and BEING there.

Quality beats quantity. Five focused minutes matter more than an hour of distracted time.

Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed. I might not get another chance to see this drawing, hear this story, share this moment.

I’m not perfect at this. I still get distracted. I still think about work.

But I’m trying. That counts for something.

I’m sorry for the moments I was there but not really there.

I’m working on it.

You deserve my full attention. I’m learning to give it.

I love you. When I’m with you, I want to truly be WITH you.

That’s the goal I’m aiming for.